Making God-Honoring Decisions

We make decisions every day, even every minute, without realizing it. We make decisions about what to wear, what route to take to work, what to cook for supper, when to do household chores, and how to do them, to name a few.

These types of decisions are viewed as trivial, and the fear of making the wrong one is typically low. These decisions can easily be changed, and there are several right ways to do them. Some decisions in life are more permanent and less likely to be easily or frequently changed.

Fear and Anxiety and God-Honoring Decisions

Fear and anxiety in decision-making can be debilitating. Some will date the same person for years for fear that if they get married, it will be to the wrong person, or for fear of it ending in divorce. Some will struggle in a job and not apply for a new job for fear of it being the wrong job, the wrong company, or not enough pay or stability.

Anxiety is the fear of the unknown. We will continue in something that is not best for the sole reason of it being the known. Remind yourself that the unknown becomes the known relatively quickly. When you start a new job, it is the unknown, and after you have been there for a few days or months, it becomes more and more known.

We want to make the right decision and want it to be so clear that we can’t make a mistake. A billboard or writing in the sky would be nice and clear, but where would our faith be if that were how God communicated to us about His will and direction in our lives?

Decision-making takes multiple parts of the brain. The brain is a meticulously designed machine that uses the prefrontal cortex, the parietal and temporal cortex, the insula, and the cerebellum to complete the decision-making process. Decision-making shouldn’t be taken lightly, as there is much more involved beyond what we can see. We need God’s direction because He sees the big picture.

Are we ever completely “ready” to get married, have children, change jobs, move, or make any other major decision? We think we have to be fully knowledgeable and aware of everything to make these decisions. Yes, there is maturity and financial stability that help the decisions we make, like marriage, to be a healthy one. I recently read the statement, “You’ll never feel ready because ready isn’t a feeling, it’s a decision.”

If we solely made our decisions based on our feelings, kids wouldn’t go to school every day, adults wouldn’t go to work every day, and the essential things in life would not get done. Even the things we love take effort and decision-making. I love corporate worship, Bible study, fellowship, and ministry. However, it is still a decision to do it faithfully and be committed to it even when I don’t “feel” like it or am tired.

As Christians, we desire to be obedient to God and don’t want to make decisions without His guidance. Sometimes we get anxious and think we need to decide because God isn’t moving or leading us in one direction or another. In such situations, we are either impatient or not hearing Him and not seeing His guidance. We are to “wait upon the Lord,” but we are impatient people who live in an instant society.

Many years ago, my husband and I were involved in a difficult job situation, and we were asking God to show us what to do and whether to go or stay. I “heard” God say, “W.A.I.T. stands for Who Am I Trusting?” Ouch!! I have used this in making several major decisions since then. Am I trusting myself to make the right decision, or to “make it happen,” or am I trusting God?

How do we make God-honoring decisions?

Pray

Prayer is the foundation of our faith, and yet it is often neglected and not the first thing we do. We need to focus on how we pray. We might say a quick prayer, “Lord, give me wisdom in this situation,” or “Guide me in the right  direction.” While there is nothing wrong with praying this way, there are things we can pray more specifically.

“Lord, open my eyes to see every aspect of this situation and make me open to Your guidance even when it is not what I want or think is best.” Specifically ask God, “How should I handle my son or daughter’s behavior?” “How should I respond to my boss’s criticism in a healthy and God honoring way?” Sometimes we can know what God doesn’t want us to do before we see what He does want us to do. Knowing what He doesn’t want us to do is part of the process.

Ask God to lead you to godly counsel

Reach out to a Godly friend or family member, Christian counselor, or pastor. You are not necessarily asking them what you should do, but to help you think through all avenues, and ask them if you are missing anything.

Journal

Write out your thoughts, list the pros and cons of the decision, or write out your prayers. When we write things down, we use more than one of our five senses, which helps us process the information more effectively. Writing it also helps us see it from another perspective, even though we were the ones who wrote it.

It causes us to take a step back from our own lives and see them from another perspective. It also helps to “just get it out.” In a journal, we can write things as we think them without worrying about whether it makes sense or how it sounds. Journaling can help us gather our thoughts for specific prayers or to be able to better communicate to others what we are struggling with.

Take time

Some decisions need more time than others. Remember when you were in school and a teacher said, “Think long, think wrong” about answering questions on a test? Someone can apply this to making decisions in life. I am aware that some decisions need to take longer, but there comes a point at which the longer we wait, the more time we have to wrestle with what to do.

Recognize that often a big decision is made by making small decisions until we get there

Take the next right step, and at the end, you will be where God wanted you to be. Sometimes God only gives you the direction for the next step, and we need to be obedient with that step rather than asking God for the whole plan before we act.

Just because we are embarking on a life-altering decision doesn’t mean that it is a difficult decision to make. It doesn’t mean that the effects of the decision are not difficult in the midst of them.. For example, you may know that you need to live closer to your aging parents. Still, you know it will be a significant transition for you and your children due to the drastic change in environment, culture, and support.

Ask yourself these questions

• Does the decision I need to make go against Scripture?
• Does the decision I need to make affect my walk with Christ or my witness?
• Is the decision time sensitive and needs to be made now, or can it wait for a little while?
• What thoughts and emotions fuel your hesitancy?
• What would it take to experience more peace in the decision?

There are several verses that we cling to in decision-making. These verses are so frequently taught and read that we often don’t think about or process their true meaning. Proverbs 3:5-6 says, “Trust in the Lord with all of your heart and lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him, and he will make your paths straight.”

A word that is often overlooked is the word “all.” It is used twice in these two verses. These verses remind us not to give God just part of us but all of it. If we give Him all of us, He can mold and make us into what He designed us to be.

James 1:5 says, “But if any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God who gives to all generously and without reproach, and it will be given to him.” God wants us to seek Him and turn to Him for what we need, and that is wisdom. It comes from God and not from anywhere else.

Next Steps

Christian counseling can offer a means to process and work through life’s decisions. A counselor is not going to tell you what to do but will walk beside you as you work through the process. They can see things that maybe you are not able to. A Christian counselor has the same desire to honor God in their decisions and will encourage you to do the same.